100 km beauty champion: the more struggle the more joy to cross the finish line
Behind the running
is a persistence that never gives up.
is a heart of self-discipline and desire for excellence.
is all the beauty and scenery encountered on the road.
is the small happiness of enjoying an empty mind.
and the pride and emotion of becoming stronger through running.
When I graduated from university, I fought hard for a great opportunity to pursue my dreams. I didn't want to live a life planned out for me, nor did I want everything arranged by my parents' 'for my own good'. I didn't want to settle! So I went against my parents' wishes, leading to conflicts and growing estrangement. From peaceful communication to arguments, and then to cold wars, the worst was when my parents didn't contact me for half a year.
Living alone away from home brought immense pressure, compounded by the disputes with my parents. Deep down, I was tormented. There are no parents who don't love their children, and no children who don't feel for their parents. After my father was unexpectedly hospitalized, I sorted out my feelings and returned home, temporarily complying with my parents' arrangements...
After that, problems arose with my long-term boyfriend. He couldn't settle in my city, and I didn't want to make my parents sad anymore. Under such pressure and distance, our mutual understanding and consideration gradually faded. Our relationship teetered on the brink of collapse several times. Finally, after one argument, we fell silent for a long time, and with difficulty, hung up the phone and never contacted each other again.
With my dreams shattered, my relationship broken, and my job loathed, these anxieties left me physically and mentally exhausted. My former confidence and enthusiasm vanished. The negativity towards life and uncertainty about the future made me decadent every day. As an already introverted person, I became more withdrawn into my own world, unwilling to communicate with the outside world.
In May 2016, out of boredom, I was scrolling through my mundane social media feed as usual and saw my cousin participating in a marathon. Everyone in the group photo looked so sunny and cute. It seemed like a string deep inside me was gently plucked.
During this period, my life was a mess. My diet and sleep were irregular. I couldn't sleep at night and couldn't get up in the morning. Originally weighing 95 pounds, I dropped to 80 pounds. Sub-health followed. Although I was born in the 90s, I felt like a pendulum lacking power, swinging numbly without any new breakthroughs or changes...
Seeing my condition, my parents shed tears several times. Looking at their distressed eyes, I thought I needed a way to self-regulate. Perhaps running could be a way to vent my emotions.
After setting a time with my brother, I nervously dressed in sportswear and waited early at the track. After my brother taught me some simple warm-ups, we started running. From the initial ease to later gasping for breath, I finally couldn't move my legs anymore and refused to run further. My brother told me we had run nearly 5 kilometers. My first 5 kilometers in life gave me a slight sense of achievement, like seeing a glimmer of light in the darkness.
To hold onto this sense of achievement, I gradually adapted, running 5 kilometers, then 7 kilometers, and eventually 10 kilometers. Running a few laps every afternoon became a routine. Gradually, I fell in love with the feeling of running. When happy, I ran comfortably; when unhappy, I ran wildly, stopping only when I couldn't bear it anymore. There was no emotion that 10 kilometers couldn't solve. If not, then 20 kilometers. At that time, the sweaty exhilaration was the only and best way to relieve stress.
Perhaps because more people were paying attention to health, a long-distance running event was held in my hometown. Because of this event, I joined the long-distance running association, transitioning from running alone to running with a group, which gave me more motivation. I also gradually became more cheerful and no longer wallowed in despair.
In August, at the Taiyuan Marathon, encouraged by everyone, I signed up. It was my first marathon. Runners from all over the country were there, with tens of thousands running together. Everyone's face was full of passion and vitality, brimming with positive energy. I suddenly felt proud to be one of the participants.
Since it was my first marathon, as a novice runner with little experience, every step after 30km was a revelation. Difficulty, pain, and struggle filled every cell. I constantly cursed myself for entering the race and vowed never to sign up again. But on the track, there were always encouraging words from strangers. Every sincere cheer and friendly help was so warm. I told myself I couldn't give up and had to finish the race.
At the moment I reached the finish line, I surpassed myself. The more struggle along the way, the more joy at that moment.
When a volunteer hung the medal around my neck, all the hardships endured turned into equal amounts of motivation. All the emotions merged into this first marathon of my life: I had drunk the strongest liquor, given up someone I loved deeply, abandoned good opportunities, accepted poor choices, and endured heart-wrenching pressure. Once all this was over, the most beautiful future awaited.
At that moment, I smiled sweetly.
After constantly surpassing my limits, I thought of trying a 100-kilometer trail race, which turned out to be the most painful race for me.
Midway through the race, I received news of my beloved grandmother's passing. Holding back tears and gritting my teeth, I couldn't hear what was being said on the other end of the phone. My legs felt like they were filled with lead, unable to move. To avoid blocking the path for other runners, I could only hide 5 meters off the track and curled up, crying for a long, long time... until the other runners had all passed and disappeared, and I remained motionless.
I helplessly looked around the deserted mountains. There was no comfort, no hugs, and no empathy. I could only rely on myself. Reason told me that even if I withdrew from the race now, the earliest flight would be tomorrow. Since I couldn't return immediately, I might as well do my best in the present. Since I chose to step onto the track, I would face the wind and rain head-on!
I stepped back onto the track. The cold wind made me shiver. The wind in the mountains could be so cold. Pain and despair filled me. I clutched my chest and trudged along. I don't know how I managed to run step by step. Near the finish line, I wiped away the tears that had flowed all the way and crossed the line with a smile.
Perhaps this is the world of adults. No matter what you are going through or enduring, you can only bury everything deep in your heart and strive forward with tears in your eyes.
After the race, I checked my watch and found that my pace for that segment was unexpectedly 13.14. Perhaps it was my grandmother saying goodbye in her way. It was her motivation that helped me win the women's first place in the Dali 100-kilometer race.
In August 2018, Longcheng Trail Race warm-up, women's first place.
In October 2018, Taiyuan Longcheng International Trail Race, 60 kilometers, women's fourth place.
In November 2018, Hangzhou International Marathon, first place for women from Shanxi, 3:36:25.
In March 2019, Wuxi International Marathon, successfully PB 3:25:59.
In April 2019, Great Wall Commune Trail Race, women's runner-up.
In May 2019, Yuquanshan Trail Race, 30 kilometers, women's runner-up.
In May 2019, Lei Yue Trail Dali 100 Trail Race, women's champion.
Every first time in life is so unforgettable. By now, I seem to have lost count of how many races I've participated in. From road running to trail running, from difficult to easy, from being accompanied by family to traveling alone. Although the initial excitement of the first race is gone, each race brings different rewards. The sense of achievement and joy at the finish line are the most beautiful records of life.
I learned to steal time to exercise amidst busyness, balancing work and hobbies. With the perseverance to run in the cold winter, the hot summer, under the dark morning sky, and the reflection of the stars, I learned to capture every glimmer of light in life. With a good mindset, I bravely changed jobs, striving according to my own wishes. My parents also supported my decisions with peace of mind. It seems life has shown me a different kind of affection.